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the duff joke thread

category: residue [glöplog]
A man walks into a pub and sees a dog licking its balls.

He says to the barman "wish I could do that".

Barman replies "buy him a biscuit and he might let you".
added on the 2010-12-16 03:58:51 by FunGas FunGas
What's "the DUFF joke thread"?

A brunette was jumping along railroad tracks, saying, “21, 21, 21.” A blonde comes along and starts doing the same thing. They hear a train and the brunette jumps off, but the blonde keeps jumping. The blonde gets hit and dies. After the train leaves, the brunette jumps back on saying this time, “22, 22, 22....”
added on the 2010-12-16 06:07:03 by ringofyre ringofyre
An English couple, an American couple and a Swedish couple is having breakfast together.

The English man says to his mate, "pass me the honey, honey", following suit the American man says "pass me the sugar, sugar".

The swedish man thinking he to had follow the romantic examples says:

"Pass me the milk you cow"
added on the 2010-12-16 09:04:12 by Deus Deus
A football coach noticed that his star tackle, Bubba, had so many women hanging around that he couldn’t possibly handle all of them.
So one day he asked Bubba, “Just what the hell is your secret?” Bubba replied, “Well, coach, whenever I’m about to have sex, I always whip it out and bang it on the dresser like a hammer. That numbs it and I can screw ’em forever!”
The coach went home early that day and went straight to the bedroom. He heard his wife in the shower and, seeing a window of opportunity, tore off his clothes and started banging his penis on the dresser.
His wife immediately stuck her head out of the shower and said, “Is that you, Bubba?”
added on the 2010-12-16 09:56:10 by ringofyre ringofyre
my dog has no nose. -how does it smell? bad!
added on the 2010-12-16 10:38:56 by maali maali
A horse walks into a pub, the bar man asks "why the long face?"
added on the 2010-12-16 12:19:16 by Intrinsic Intrinsic
A man walked into a pub, but luckily he didn't have any major injuries.
added on the 2010-12-16 13:16:39 by sagacity sagacity
A man walks into a demoparty, AMGIAAAAAAAAAAA!
added on the 2010-12-16 14:26:23 by Deus Deus
Jesus saves, Tom Waits.
added on the 2010-12-16 14:45:21 by Gargaj Gargaj
My computer said "out of memory" and then I wrote in basic "God Damnit! Put them into the memory!!!"
added on the 2010-12-16 14:49:09 by Optimus Optimus
When you choke a Smurf, which colour does it turn?
added on the 2010-12-16 14:51:25 by trc_wm trc_wm
what do you get when you reverse poop? -dirty hands. HAR HAR HAR!
added on the 2010-12-16 15:04:35 by maali maali
Who is Major Failure and why is he reading my drive??
added on the 2010-12-16 15:10:20 by okkie okkie
Who is Art and why does life imitate him?
added on the 2010-12-16 15:11:04 by okkie okkie
.. better Nate than lever!
added on the 2010-12-16 15:11:23 by okkie okkie
.. better a hole in your sock than a sock in your hole.
added on the 2010-12-16 15:45:08 by trc_wm trc_wm
Keyboard not found. press F1 to continue...
added on the 2010-12-16 15:58:14 by maali maali
a glow worm say to a grasshopper :
come on , let's make a light & sound show !!
added on the 2010-12-16 16:00:49 by bLa bLa
A dyslexic walks into a bra...
added on the 2010-12-16 16:42:46 by scoutski scoutski
A demoscener walks into a bar
-We're out of stock.
added on the 2010-12-16 17:29:34 by xernobyl xernobyl
Kebby wants to spray his lawn....he dont want DDT
added on the 2010-12-16 22:29:18 by Deus Deus
Sorry, aquivit made that sound good.
added on the 2010-12-16 22:31:16 by Deus Deus
2 Irishmen walk into a bar & the bartender says "This is a joke isn't it?"
added on the 2010-12-16 22:34:35 by ringofyre ringofyre
An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman being chased by police,
turn down a blind alley, find some empty sacks lying there.
Quickly, they each get into a sack.

A policeman walks up with his torch and sees the sacks moving.
He boots the first sack and the Scotsman says "woof, woof"
He boots the second sack and the Englishman says "meow, meow"
He boots the third, and the Irishman says "Potatoes".
added on the 2010-12-16 22:35:29 by FunGas FunGas

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