Punny demo scene messages for a news ticker
category: offtopic [glöplog]
Hi, folks. I'm making a news ticker for funny messages that should look like they're in the background of a news cast. They are punny and relate to tracker music, the demo scene and retro computing. I need you to supply me with your own suggestions! So let the creative juice flow!
Here are some of mine:
The Deadline demo party had to be cancelled after making AI generated demos mandatory. No human sceners showed up.
A new study has found that prolonged exposure to pretracker music can caause Alzheimer's disease. Then again, what doesn't?
A study based on god knows what states that 11 out of 10 Amiga users the prefer Coca-cola, while 12 out 7.2 Atari users prefer Pepsi. Anyone surprised?"
The site ModArchive has long struggled with getting "five nines" in uptime. But they are coming close, as they now can boast with an uptime of "nine fives."
ERICADE.radio host DJ Daemon voices concern that "all bloody blippety-blop music is called chiptune music these days. Back in my day...". Commenters then interrupted him with "OK, boomer".
Madonna announces that she will start creating chiptune music. "I have already destroyed... like... what... 5 different music styles already. This will be fun." News at 11.
Here are some of mine:
The Deadline demo party had to be cancelled after making AI generated demos mandatory. No human sceners showed up.
A new study has found that prolonged exposure to pretracker music can caause Alzheimer's disease. Then again, what doesn't?
A study based on god knows what states that 11 out of 10 Amiga users the prefer Coca-cola, while 12 out 7.2 Atari users prefer Pepsi. Anyone surprised?"
The site ModArchive has long struggled with getting "five nines" in uptime. But they are coming close, as they now can boast with an uptime of "nine fives."
ERICADE.radio host DJ Daemon voices concern that "all bloody blippety-blop music is called chiptune music these days. Back in my day...". Commenters then interrupted him with "OK, boomer".
Madonna announces that she will start creating chiptune music. "I have already destroyed... like... what... 5 different music styles already. This will be fun." News at 11.
Found waaaaaaay too many ideas. Here's a sample :
1-BREAKING NEWS ! Maali reveals he's NOT from Mali ! "I'm actually from Kewltron !" he told us in a shock interview. "Also, Kewlers aren't THAT kewl. Except LB. That guy's a legend. No, not THAT leGend, that's just Remy LeBeau ! The other one !"
2-Adok's AdBlock ! Blocks ads around the clock, from Woodstock to Vladivostok, stops them harder than Braddock with a freaking Glock ! Our cool price might give you a shock ! Adok's AdBlock just rocks ! NEW : Now blocks ads on Tiktok !
3-For all your ceremonies, happenings, corporate venues, deimosparties : Demoscenes the Great ! Damascene pigeon airshows and aerobatics, copper-mechanical music, and the worlds biggest 8*8 starfield-scrolling active mosaic ! Miracles of science, maths and philosophy ! One of a kind ! Available in all of Greece ! Send pigeon requests to Athens's Acropolis dovecote (or get there in person and ask for Optimus or Navis, my assistants) !
1-BREAKING NEWS ! Maali reveals he's NOT from Mali ! "I'm actually from Kewltron !" he told us in a shock interview. "Also, Kewlers aren't THAT kewl. Except LB. That guy's a legend. No, not THAT leGend, that's just Remy LeBeau ! The other one !"
2-Adok's AdBlock ! Blocks ads around the clock, from Woodstock to Vladivostok, stops them harder than Braddock with a freaking Glock ! Our cool price might give you a shock ! Adok's AdBlock just rocks ! NEW : Now blocks ads on Tiktok !
3-For all your ceremonies, happenings, corporate venues, deimosparties : Demoscenes the Great ! Damascene pigeon airshows and aerobatics, copper-mechanical music, and the worlds biggest 8*8 starfield-scrolling active mosaic ! Miracles of science, maths and philosophy ! One of a kind ! Available in all of Greece ! Send pigeon requests to Athens's Acropolis dovecote (or get there in person and ask for Optimus or Navis, my assistants) !
Breaking: TITAN SUCKS
but i AM from Mali :(
and kewlers ARE cool
"BREAKING: Old scener farts still attempting to reuse stamps to send in remote entries"
"Floppy disk prices soar after hipsters claim they sound vintage if you shake them"
"Local dad claims he can fix any computer; proceeds to blow into cartridge"
"Amiga user insists his 30 year old machine still boots faster than any modern laptop; Experts agree."
"Shader developer achieves enlightenment after staring at raymarching bug for 72 hours"
"Scientists confirm: Sceners can compress universe into 8k, but not their feelings."
"After 15 years, ### still song, still people dancing ###"
"After a grueling journey, dental implants found. Well done, Kevin!"
"Floppy disk prices soar after hipsters claim they sound vintage if you shake them"
"Local dad claims he can fix any computer; proceeds to blow into cartridge"
"Amiga user insists his 30 year old machine still boots faster than any modern laptop; Experts agree."
"Shader developer achieves enlightenment after staring at raymarching bug for 72 hours"
"Scientists confirm: Sceners can compress universe into 8k, but not their feelings."
"After 15 years, ### still song, still people dancing ###"
"After a grueling journey, dental implants found. Well done, Kevin!"
Used cycles for sale. Only used once. Contact Bonzai for prices.
Scener has apparently found a way to get 257 different values out of a byte.
Government has decided they should own your computer and decide what you can use it for. It's necessary because of the climate.
Protip of the day: If you comment out all your code, you won't get any errors.
Scener has apparently found a way to get 257 different values out of a byte.
Government has decided they should own your computer and decide what you can use it for. It's necessary because of the climate.
Protip of the day: If you comment out all your code, you won't get any errors.
100 sceners rushed to hospital with perforated eardrums after unfortunate website typo causes Revision to hold its first ever Screaming Music compo
C64 coder's revolutionary "9 simultaneous sprites" technique fails to impress other participants in coca cola drinking contest
Chipmods and YM Rockerz apprehended after fight, belligerents written up on copper list.
Sawtooth diagnosed as insufficiently wavy, was prescribed sinecure.
Sawtooth diagnosed as insufficiently wavy, was prescribed sinecure.
Bootblock virus eradicates entire cobbler street.
Musician accused of lameness feels invisible - can't be scene.
Musician accused of lameness feels invisible - can't be scene.
Photoshop graphician vows to learn pixel art in heartfelt New Year's Low Resolution.
Party invitation deemed too suggestive, censored to avoid risk of invitro fertilization.
You guys are great. I'm having a blast reading your entries ! :D
If I may quote from a modern master (Merrivius) : "lol" said the elf, "lmao !"
If I may quote from a modern master (Merrivius) : "lol" said the elf, "lmao !"
Huge thanks, folks!
I'm going to add them in a short while. Really great.
I'm going to add them in a short while. Really great.
Thank you again. I have added your suggestions now.
Here is a beta of the ticker:
https://ericade.radio/radiodb/ticker.htm
Here you can see it in action (click the Live link):
https://www.youtube.com/@ericade-radio2998
And on Twitch:
https://www.twitch.tv/theericaderadionetwork
Here is a beta of the ticker:
https://ericade.radio/radiodb/ticker.htm
Here you can see it in action (click the Live link):
https://www.youtube.com/@ericade-radio2998
And on Twitch:
https://www.twitch.tv/theericaderadionetwork
AMIGGAAAAAAA!
