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Let's have Cybersex!

category: general [glöplog]
 

I slowly remove your woolen hat.
added on the 2007-01-29 20:42:01 by Stelthzje Stelthzje
I kick you in the nuts, punch you in the mouth and when you're out cold, I steal your wallet.
added on the 2007-01-29 20:46:47 by okkie okkie
To take some condoms.
added on the 2007-01-29 20:56:14 by xernobyl xernobyl
i carefully pull the cash and drivers license out of your wallet.
added on the 2007-01-29 20:56:59 by madMixx madMixx
BB Image
added on the 2007-01-29 20:59:27 by texel texel
in b4 steohawk talking about pedophilia
added on the 2007-01-29 21:00:51 by nitro2k01 nitro2k01
I like where this is headed >)
added on the 2007-01-29 21:01:10 by xteraco xteraco
stalemate
added on the 2007-01-29 21:22:00 by rmeht rmeht
I watch from the shadows, slowly stroking my enormous manly erection. The crime is making me so horny. I moan softly as okkie loots your unconscious body. It's so wrong it makes me feel just right. As he leaves the room, I crawl towards you, still holding my manhood in one hand. I wonder if shooting my load all over your battered face would be unethical or just incredibly hot.

Suddenly there's a knock on the door. "Polizei!" the door says, in a voice that means to be taken seriously. Oh no! If they see me like this, they'll get the wrong idea! In a moment of panic, I throw myself against the window. Fortunately, my erect penis breaks through the glass well ahead of me, and the sweet sensation of the broken shards on my well-above-average testicles finally releases my tension. Through sudden orgasmic clarity i harness the true power within me, spin 720 degrees mid-air, grow wings and fly to safety.

You are rushed to the emergency room where they have to operate on you, but they can't seem to find the anesthetics so it's a traumatic, even hellish experience. Surgery lasts for the worst five hours anyone has ever had no choice but to endure, but you survive. They can't fix your face, though, and you must live the rest of your life as a freak. You are also sterile but that's okay because nobody would want you now anyway.
added on the 2007-01-29 22:16:16 by doomdoom doomdoom
fuckings to the ones who spoiled this thread. i still love you all but i hand you fuckings. bigtime.
added on the 2007-01-29 22:34:08 by apricot apricot
whoops wrong thread, disregard that last statement !
added on the 2007-01-29 22:35:31 by apricot apricot
I put on my robe and wizard hat
added on the 2007-01-29 23:26:21 by teel teel
to take some condoms
added on the 2007-01-29 23:41:07 by xernobyl xernobyl
Quote:
I put on my robe and wizard hat

I am so hard.
added on the 2007-01-30 02:01:48 by Shifter Shifter
Quote:

whoops wrong thread, disregard that last statement !


No.
Quote:
fuckings to the ones who spoiled this thread. i still love you all but i hand you fuckings. bigtime.


You are a bit brief, try to describe that more detailed.

added on the 2007-01-30 21:56:32 by Stelthzje Stelthzje
hahaha! :)
added on the 2007-01-30 22:45:00 by prm prm
Code: C:\games\>ZEX.EXE ------------ZEX-------------- You are standing in front of a gorgeous looking girl. She has beautiful blue eyes and long blonde hair, and if she wasn't so hot, you'd realize she was staring back. She's only wearing a shirt, but left hand is cupped over her vulva. Her ring and middle fingers are slowly moving up and down. She says "Take me now!" There's a girl to the north, a door to the south and to the west lies a window The weather is nice. >have sex with girl She's too far away. >go north >have sex with girl With what? >with my manhood Your manhood what? >penis There's no such thing! >have sex with girl using penis You have to take it out first. >take penis out. Try pulling your zipper down first. >open zipper With what? >hand Hand what? >open zipper with hand Done. >take penis out It emerges from the darkness of your pants. >have sex with girl Wow, really romantic. Maybe she wants to have some foreplay >have foreplay With what? >girl What?! >have foreplay with girl She wants you to close the curtains first. >draw curtains You're too far away. >go west You wouldn't want to go there with your dick hanging out, would you? >save Done. >close zipper You close the zipper and it totally rips your wiener apart. Blood is spraying everywhere... YOU DIE. >restore You are standing in front of a gorgeous looking girl. She has beautiful blue eyes and long blonde hair, and if she wasn't so hot, you'd realize she was staring back. She's only wearing a shirt, but left hand is cupped over her vulva. Her ring and middle fingers are slowly moving up and down. She says "Take me now!" There's a girl to the north, a door to the south and to the west lies a window Your zipper is open. Your ding-dong is enjoying the fresh air. The weather is nice. >put penis in pants With what? >put penis in pants with hands Whatever you say. >close zipper with hands Done! The girl is moaning loudly. >go west You are standing at the window. The curtains ar open. There are old people outside. >close curtains With what? The old people are loudly whispering about you. >close curtains with hands Done. >go east You are standing at the girl again. >have sex with girl using penis You have to take it out first >damnit Watch your language! >open zipper Done. >take penis out The beast is loose. >have sex with girl using penis She wants to have some foreplay first, remember? >have foreplay with girl If it only was that easy... She's getting impatient. You can tell from her moans. >gently touch the girls legs Nice try, but too late. She is not in the mood anymore. YOU LOSE. >exit The what now? >quit Are you sure? >y Yes or no. >Yes C:\games\>del zex.exe C:\games\>rott.exe
added on the 2007-01-30 23:13:48 by linde linde
Hijack! Rise of The Triads! What a wickedly fun lan game that was. That and Carmageddon were the best fun ever for me over a network. Must mention Skies though /wave amusic :)
added on the 2007-01-30 23:50:37 by Intrinsic Intrinsic
ROTFL!!!
added on the 2007-01-31 16:05:16 by Optimus Optimus
Has anyone ever had phone-cyber-sex?

"I'm phoning you up and making obscene comments..."
it can be extended to phone-cyber-phone sex:

"I'm talking to you on the phone pretending to have cyber sex with you"
added on the 2007-01-31 20:46:16 by linde linde
btw, yes rott roxx. i thought it'd be the best alternative to zex.exe
added on the 2007-01-31 20:46:54 by linde linde

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